I was born in a small, small town in oklahoma. I moved to a town in the oklahoma-texas border and i moved 4 times in the span of 5 years. My house burnt down, so i lived in a place that didn't even have a grocery store. Then i moved to this other place that got a shitty mayor that made taxes higher (we were too poor to pay for them) so we moved again. After my parents got divorced i moved in with my mom back in the small, small town i was born at. My dad moved 5 times in the span of 4 years on his own. He got 2 girlfriends (both were shit) and now he lives in the last place we were at before they got divorced. Both houses are fine. My mother is obsessed with pets. We have like 7 at her house (if you dont coun't the fish...) We have 3 cats and 4 dogs. The dogs are old. My cats aren't. All of my cats are strays.

I've always struggled with something. I wouldn't call myself overweight as a kid but due to my asthma i ended up becoming very lazy and not wanting to do exercise. Especially when i was 10-12 i would fit my moms clothing. I'm a health freak i guess you could say now, But sometimes i can't help but have a sugary snack. Especially soda, i would exclusively drink soda. While my parents cared about my health, We'd usually get sodium-filled lunchables/TV dinners with a box of ice cream to go along with it. Of course it's cheap and simple to buy all that stuff, but it led to me and my brothers to not be the healthiest. We still aren't. Staying healthy/going on a diet isn't cheap, i know. Every 'healthier' version of normal stuff (cereal, candy, juice) is more expensive because only the middle class can be healthy! Spit on the poor! Being vegan and buying plant based foods is healthier in some instances, but sometimes they just lie.

Exercise isn't too hard. My mom used to be really big on exercising until she got a job where she can barely be home. I exercise sometimes but since im a lazy bitch (kind of) i dont do it too often. I'm pretty short and have a baby face so if i become extremely skinny ill look like im 10, and i dont really want that! I can't do sit-ups. Never have never will. I can't do push-ups for too long or else i can't move my arms. Speaking of arms, i have very scrawny ones. Teeny. And my hands are weird. My ex used to make fun of my hands. He sucked. I have a weird body. Half of my weight goes to my lower half. I have a gut. It sucks. I have a lot of energy sometimes. I still have horrid asthma but my mom helps me out with it. She says i can get a gym membership next year.

Being bi sucks. I always struggled with my orientation. There's always gonna be a brainwashed asshole that tells you you're going to hell if you won't change. There's always gonna be a sad asshole who sexualizes you for liking the same gender. Being in a small town in oklahoma, i'd be burnt by the stake if i embrace it. Being goth sucks, i'll be burnt by the stake if i go all out. Of course, im not saying that being goth and being queer are the same thing. You can be goth and straight. But both will get you the "you're going to hell little lady!" if you embrace it.

i hate myself